dinjai

california kids in 25-degree weather...

2011-12-22T21:39:00.000-08:00

last less than half an hour.

it's christmas time, so we decided to "go see snow." i know, it sounds ridiculous. and it kind of was. but anyway, here we have reed in the same snow clothes he wore two years ago when we went to utah for christmas. they were a bit snug. i couldn't stop laughing whenever i looked at him. max and dean are on the left in the back.

this picture is rather deceptive. brynn looks almost happy in this shot. she was most displeased that we would bring her outside in such appalling temperatures.

see my hand? i don't think i could feel it. also, be glad you cannot hear brynn.

max the snow ninja

this is how reed spent most of his time. he had a really hard time moving in his snow pants that were made for an 18-month-old. while he was down, he would usually snack on a little snow. then, "mom, help!"

the adventurers. max wrote a book about it after we got home.

again, be glad there is no sound with these pictures. by now about 15 minutes have elapsed since we got everybody dressed for the snow, and reed and brynn (and mommy) are done.

"m-mom, it's t-too c-coooooold!"
"my hot chocolate spilled in the snooooooooooow"

okay, boys. say, "i'm warm!" (turns out our car has a heating function that magically changes the mood of our children!)

then troy turned on us.

and so did dean.

but we were safe in the car. best snowball fight ever.

oh, you rascals. :)

so. let's take stock of how we spent our time today.
driving to the snow: 120 minutes
donning gear: 15 minutes
actually playing outside in the snow: 20 minutes
weeping and wailing about the cold: at least 15 minutes
removing gear: 10 minutes
driving home from the snow: 140 minutes (there was traffic)

i'm not saying it wasn't worth it. and dean has really toughened up. last time we went to the snow he was the first to break down, i think. and once everybody was warm, they reported a really awesome time in the snow. also, the drive down the mountain sounded like a roller coaster ride! we'll probably do it again next year. :)

the best part was that i got a NAP when we got home! troy is the best husband ever. he even fed brynn a bottle so he wouldn't have to disturb me.

merry christmas!

butterfly reserve and the sticks

2011-12-22T21:24:00.000-08:00

here's how we spent the second half of our day in santa barbara. see? i told you linda was there! here we are before taking the trail to the butterfly reserve.

isn't the sunlight glorious? that's max on the left. he found his stick. it will figure prominently later.

the boys are looking up at the butterflies. troy told them it was best to look straight up.

and here is what they were looking at. those dark clumps are all monarch butterflies, hanging out here for the winter.

you can see better that they are butterflies as opposed to dead leaves here.

this one was all by itself, and right next to you on the trail. we walked right by it at first. i love the sun shining through its wings. good shot, troy!

say, "butterflies!"

here's dean, looking epic.

max requested that troy take a picture of his stick.

and then, so did dean.

here's max looking epic. with his stick.

reed didn't want to be left out.

dean tried to drive home. maybe when your feet can touch the pedals, pal. :)

santa barbara mission

2011-12-22T21:19:00.000-08:00

https://picasaweb.google.com/107208655884324651674/SantaBarbaraMission?authkey=Gv1sRgCOfG-siN9onICg

we finally made it to santa barbara to visit troy's aunt linda (who, for some reason, is not included in the pictures, but she really was there--see next post about the butterflies). we met linda at the mission, and then everybody waited around so i could feed the baby (hence the Heroic Entrance of Mom picture).

there was a lovely creche outside the mission on the lawn with live animals--and no baby Jesus. linda said they don't leave him out in the manger because he has disappeared in times past.

the cactus are in the courtyard inside the mission. aren't they beautiful? :)

i've been on a mission kick lately. i have seen signs for historic missions on the freeway for years and we're finally going to see them. we went to see the san gabriel mission a couple weeks ago (but forgot the camera). turns out "mission style" architecture is pretty faithful to actual missions. the cool thing about the missions we've seen so far is that they are currently functioning churches. it's fun to see california history. :)

2011-12-22T17:41:00.000-08:00

Dean and Max worked together to build a "Concert" one day last week.

A diverse crowd including off-duty clone troopers, robots, and a short-legged dude.

That's Dean at the guitar.

We had to lift the roof to get a good look at Max's drums and Reed on the cello.

I love crowded events!

2011-12-15T14:21:00.000-08:00

I went to Dean's school concert today. Each grade sang a holiday song. I got there maybe 3 minutes before it was set to start, and this was my view. Can you see anything? Me neither. It made it feel really necessary to leave right after you watched your kid perform, so you could make room for other parents to see theirs. Awesome.

After many excuse-mes, someone to hold my baby, and one eye on Reed who was trying to escape, I found where Dean was sitting.

It's time for the second-graders to take the stage! I'm close enough! Surely he will see me! I'm yelling his name by now. But no.

See that girl in the red-and-green striped hat? She finally tapped Dean on the shoulder and said, "your mom is waving to you!" Thanks, Dean's friend! This shot makes the whole trip worth it.

And there he is on stage (sort of). They sang a variation on "I know an old lady who swallowed a fly," called, "I know an old lady who swallowed a bell." There were groups of kids holding things like bells, bows, gifts, a sack, a sleigh, and they would hold them up at the appropriate time. And then the principal, wearing a Santa hat, appeared and said, "ho, ho, ho!" but I kind of lost the words at the end. The kids were in charge of the song by then. (I'll have to get the words and post them. I'm curious now.)

(At Dean's old school, the kids perform for each other on one day as kind of a dress rehearsal. Then they perform for the parents, and the kids just come in when it's their turn, perform, and then head back to class. Sometimes that makes for a longish wait between acts, but at least the parents have a place to sit. I said something to that effect to the lady next to me and she suggested I chair the event next year!)

That is how I spent my morning. Also, I parked in a permit-only zone out of desperation. But wouldn't you know it? No ticket! It was a Christmas miracle! So the whole venture cost less that $65! (yes, I know the amount you get fined for parking in a no-parking zone. That is all I will say about that.)

I wonder what the third-graders did...

our christmas tree!

2011-12-15T14:15:00.000-08:00

Here are my precious little gifts under our newly decorated Christmas tree. Yes, it was this week--December 12--that we finally had it up, straight, and decorated. We had things going on!

Dean, and his newly perfected "I'm-getting-my-picture-taken" smile.

Max dubbed one ornament "planet Max." You can't see which one he's holding, but I think that is what is going on here. He found it on the floor and had to have it just so.

This is an ornament Dean made in school, "so long ago," according to him. I love seven-year-old nostalgia. :)

Merry Christmas, everyone!

the tally

2011-11-30T09:43:00.001-08:00

number of items i found actually in the laundry basket: 5
number of items i found on the floor or in the closet of dean's room: 15
number of items i found full of *poop that had molded, necessitating their removal from our house: 3

i love laundry day.

*this poopy group of items was hidden in the laundry basket, not by my almost-five-year-old, who gets my wrath every time he poops in the wrong place, but by my seven-year-old, who is going to hear it from me when he gets home from school today. hope he's saving up for a new pair of shorts.

airing of grievances

2011-11-11T14:53:00.001-08:00

dear person in charge of mandating lo-flow toilets:

is it really more environmentally responsible to make people flush FIVE TIMES and STILL have poop stuck in the toilet? why are we gently cajoling our waste to the sewer and letting it stay if it doesn't want to go right now? i'm not worried about the self-esteem of the lump of waste that is making itself comfortable in my toilet right now.

i thought part of the point of having indoor plumbing was making the gross stuff disappear--on the first flush--so the bathroom doesn't smell. and not attracting flies. and being all sanitary and stuff.

i just wanted you to know that, thanks to you, i'm "saving the environment," one gratuitous flush at a time.

poopocalypse

2011-10-26T21:38:00.000-07:00

lest ye think that everything is peaches and cream around here all the time, let me tell you about my night. dean and i were on our way back to the car after piano lessons. i called troy to find out how things were going at home, to gauge whether we could afford a little trip to mcd's. troy said, roughly, "there's been a disaster. max exploded. and i don't have the constitution to clean it up. i need your help." he had stayed home from work today because his constitution was compromised.

our trip to mcdonald's became a drive-thru visit, and we got home as quickly as we could. i told dean to stay outside with his ice cream so his brothers wouldn't be jealous, said hi to troy, and then headed upstairs to assess the damage. i don't have pictures to post of this event (you're welcome), but it was a doozy. as my pile of wipes began to grow, i re-vowed to myself that i will never, EVER have a dog in the house.

max was in the bathtub, directing my efforts, and making observations like, "mom, when i make a toot in the bathtub, it makes a bubble!" and, "i made a poop trail." how i love raising boys.

strength training

2011-10-24T09:11:00.000-07:00

since giving birth for the fourth time, my body has shown signs of weakness (go figure). my back goes out with the slightest provocation. one morning i had to ask for assistance putting my pants on--too much bending and twisting, i guess. anyway, the pain finally prompted troy to find me some back exercises. they have helped tremendously even in the short time since that morning i couldn't get dressed by myself.

well i don't have them all memorized yet, so i needed someone to read through them for me the other day. troy was gone, so dean was my only choice if i didn't want to read them myself. i got the website i wanted and handed my laptop to dean. max was on the floor with me--he wanted to do them too.

watching max attempt to pull his legs onto his chest was quite hilarious. he kept grunting, and had a hard time reaching under his legs for some reason. by the time we were pulling both legs up, we were both laughing so hard that i could hardly do it myself.

then we came to the exercise where you lift up your backside to make a straight line from your knees to you shoulders. i had to hold the position for three deep breaths, then relax and do it again. well it was just too tempting: before i knew it, i had two boys dive rolling under me while i tried to take three deep breaths. so relaxing. i counted my breaths aloud so they knew when the drawbridge was closing. it was the source of much drama. ("max! hurry! the bridge is coming down!" "dean! i can't make it!")

then dean got creative with his reading. he started editorializing on the descriptions of the cat stretch: "Position yourself on your hands and knees. Very slowly, act like a baby." dean and max were overcome with giggles. max ended up under me as i did the "cat stretch," which involves sagging one's back and then arching it like a cat's. i sagged enough that my tummy touched him every time. another wave of giggles ensued.

it was quite the event. i don't know how much actual stretching or strengthening went on, but we sure had fun. it's refreshing to just be silly with my boys sometimes.

sweet children

2011-09-28T09:17:00.000-07:00

there are things i don't want to remember about this time in my life. most of those stories are starring a recurring character called Monster Mom, who steps in when Well Rested Mom or Patient Mom takes a break. the thing is, i will remember those stories with great clarity. i just don't want to share them.
but there are some things i do want to remember, and i know i will forget them if i don't record them somewhere. and rather than try to keep them all in my head and write a big long post, i've decided to just write down whatever i remember right now and post it. there's a better chance that i'll post something this way.
so here's one that comes to mind:

the other day, i went into max and reed's room while brynn was sleeping to see what they were up to. i ended up lying down on the vacant bunk bed.

reed: mom, are you taking a nap?
me: yes, i'm taking a nap. i'm very tired.

max climbs up to his bed, throws down his quilt, climbs down, and puts his quilt on top of me.

max: mom, do you need a blanket?
me: thank you max! you got me your blanket from your bed?
max: yeah. i just want to make sure you're warm for your nap.

reed sits next to me on the bed with a book.

reed: mommy, do you want me to read you a story?
me: yes please.
reed: once upon a time, there was a good knight. and he went to the park, and played on the slide, and the swings, and he went to church, and went to primary. the end.

at this point, i had to look at what book had such a similar plot to his life. it was a book about a motorcycle policeman named max. go figure.

me: thanks for reading to me, reed. do you want to read me another book?
reed, in his best mom voice: no, not right now. you go to sleep, mommy.

they take such good care of me. :)
and then they left me alone!
i think i got to sleep for a good 20 minutes before we had to go pick up dean from school.

birthday boys

2011-07-19T22:56:00.000-07:00

very funny, dad! i think i can handle a bigger piece than that!

happy birthday, troy and dean! hope you like your biggest present this year--the baby. :)

...and here she is!

2011-07-19T22:38:00.000-07:00

brynn mei
born: 1 july 2011 at 12:54 am
weight: 8 lbs
length: 20 in

her big brothers still adore her after two whole weeks. we're all adjusting pretty well to the new addition, although "normal life" hasn't really begun in earnest yet. we'll see how things go when i'm the only adult in the house with all the little people. :)

a little late...

2011-07-19T22:28:00.000-07:00

certain of you asked me for a "belly picture," and so i'm giving it to you. this was taken on my birthday, june 9, roughly four weeks before the baby was born. does it count as a belly picture if i am no longer pregnant when i post it?

an update

2011-06-06T20:33:00.000-07:00

well folks, it's been a while, as usual. i thought it might be time for an update. biggest news: we moved to a lovely house with lots of space and a yard. and it's ours. other biggest news: we're having a baby girl next month.

troy is still happy in his job at google--and will continue to be happy for at least the next five years (remember how we just bought a house?). his main complaint is too many meetings and not enough coding. and short weeks are rough, such as the week of memorial day...

my belly continues to grow, and the baby (a girl!) continues to be very active, especially when i am winding down. although, to be fair, i feel like winding down several times in a day. i hit the five-week mark today, but no guarantees. i just hope she doesn't come on the seventh--anytime after that would be fine with me (dean, troy, and troy's dad were all born on the 7th). i'm due on the 9th.

the kids are growing and becoming their own little selves. dean is almost done with his first grade year. we switched schools when we moved, and it turned out just fine. he came home from his first day and said, "everyone is my friend, mom!" so that was a big relief. in fact, when we went to the school openhouse, a couple of moms were excited to meet "dean's mom" because their kids talked about him all the time. so apparently he's quite the big man on campus. for that openhouse, dean had to be in costume. his class has been learning about the rain forest, and everyone had picked an animal to write a report on. dean picked a gecko. good thing it's so close to halloween and we could just buy a ready-made gecko costume... here are some pictures of him in his awesome costume: https://picasaweb.google.com/kmaurine/20110527TheGecko?authkey=Gv1sRgCL6D-IvM9OeBXQ#5611548470943289394 mostly, i was glad that it was acceptable to him. my friend came and helped me make all the pieces the night before. gotta love parent-homework. :) also new in dean's life is a piano teacher. we've had a few lessons now, and so far it's "soo boring--why can't i play the guitar?" i think we've made some strides this week though (getting him to actually practice two days in a row may have something to do with that), so we'll see how far we get. i've heard the music program at his new school is pretty great, so he may decide to branch out in a couple years. meanwhile, we're twinkling little stars on the piano.

max continues to prompt bursts of laughter from his mother. he came inside one morning recently, shortly after attending a pirate-themed birthday party, looking like this: https://picasaweb.google.com/kmaurine/20110505EasterAndEarlyMay?authkey=Gv1sRgCNDaut6vnIXlLg#5614953664350700706 good thing he's around to protect me from bad guys. whew! also new on the max behavior list is hiding himself in dark places so he can snack in peace. two nights ago i was downstairs talking to troy when i noticed a tortilla chip peeking out from under the door of the closet under the stairs. i didn't remember it peeking out five minutes before. i thought that was odd because the light wasn't on in there, but i opened the door anyway, and there was max, chillin' in the dark with a bag of tortilla chips he had filched from the kitchen. it was one of those he-probably-should-be-scolded-but-it's-too-funny-not-to-laugh moments. any advice on how to laugh later? it was just such a surprise! anyway, he has another year before kindergarten since his birthday is in january, and dean is excited to be a third-grader when his little brother joins him at school.

reed is a charmer. everywhere we go, he says, "hi," to people, often several times until they realize he's speaking to them. but he always gets a warm response from people. i've gotten so used to it that i wonder why nobody looks at me when i'm out without the kids. he seems to be pretty empathetic for a two-year-old. today at church a lady was speaking and got emotional, and reed said, "oh, i'm sorry!" in response. he has to wear his shoes all the time, so he's ready to go at a moment's notice. just in case it's time to go to the park, you know. he likes to share--most of the time--and lately i've been encouraged at how he treats other people's babies. i don't know how he'll respond when he realizes our baby will not be leaving and may even compete for toys someday, but he's very gentle with them right now, and will go get a toy when he sees a baby crying. here's a current picture of reed, to be fair:

https://picasaweb.google.com/kmaurine/20110505EasterAndEarlyMay?authkey=Gv1sRgCNDaut6vnIXlLg#5614966467562698418

that's not to say that i'm not utterly spent by the end of every day. or that all three of the angelic creatures i've just described aren't likely to be running wild, screaming, spreading dirt and destruction. their favorite games to play now involve guns, good guys and bad guys, bows and arrows, tanks, terrorists, aliens, and mostly lots of screaming. so you can imagine how quiet and peaceful it is pretty regularly at our house. but now i can send them outside and have a minute to myself before someone comes in with a scrape or a grievance. they do play together well, whether it's a crazy running game outside or legos in someone's bedroom (hopefully not mine), and we have a mostly harmonious home life, for which i am very grateful. time to add more chaos to the mix! bring on the baby!

this feels more like a christmas letter than a regular update kind of thing, but i guess that's about how regularly i've been updating. sorry about that. mostly our summer plans are: have a baby, and then get used to having a baby again. the end. i'm looking forward to seeing my mom when she comes out to help with the kids and the new baby, and troy's sister is coming for a couple days, and then his mom and dad will be here to see the baby and help out. so we're excited! lots of changes in the walker family this year.

moving day!

2011-03-30T21:06:00.000-07:00

well, folks, it's finally happened. we bought a house. and yesterday, we moved in.

hooray!

status so far:

the downstairs is looking pretty good. kitchen, dining and family rooms are functional, and we lack the furniture for the living room (so excited for a new couch!)

the boys' room is slowly getting less treacherous for those of us carrying a basketball around the middle.

our new washer and dryer are getting a workout (i keep finding more pee-soaked items to wash).

there are empty shelves in the kitchen cupboards, and i think we have unpacked all the kitchen stuff. whoa.

so we're probably halfway done with the unpacking, and troy is going back to work tomorrow, having rebuilt a bunkbed and crib, and unpacked and found homes for countless items in the kitchen. good head start! pictures when it looks presentable (after i find the camera).

thank you. that is all.

the many beards of santa

2011-03-24T18:18:00.000-07:00

we found max in his bed, under the covers. at 6:15 pm. anytime a kid is voluntarily in his bed before bedtime is an occasion for further investigation.

me: are you going to sleep?

max: no, i'm just relaxing and thinking.

me: relaxing and thinking?

max: yeah. i'm thinking what santa looks like.

troy: does santa have a brown beard?

max: no, he has a white beard! a white beard on his shirt. and he has a white beard on his hat.

since we last left our heroes

2011-03-23T08:00:00.001-07:00

many things have happened. i think it all kind of started when we discovered that baby #4 will be joining us in july (no, it was not a surprise, and yes, we are finally having a girl:), necessitating a bigger place to live.

this bit of news brought up The Big Question (TBQ) about where exactly we would be settling down in our bigger place to live (i.e., somewhere with more than one bathroom and a kitchen that would admit more than one person at a time--oh, and at least another bedroom, and a yard). then troy got a raise, which broadened our search to include (much to my dismay at the time) our current neck of the woods. so before actually answering TBQ, i started looking around here, sort of half-heartedly, but with a realtor, so sort of seriously too. i say half-heartedly because i was holding out for exiting the golden state in favor of greener (read: cheaper, more seasonal) pastures. friends of ours (who also work for google) recently moved to Colorado and have found it to perfectly suit their needs and desires. we went to visit them sans fils (thanks to a well-timed visit from Grandma Corinne--you're the best!) and came home feeling that, while our friends' move to CO was the perfect thing for them, it was not the perfect thing for us at this juncture.

so that's how we spent january--looking for a house. in february, we found a house, made an offer, got accepted, and then proceeded to agonize over a lender, choose a lender, and sign at least 4,000 documents (i wish i were exaggerating more). we closed escrow on time, and this month we've been making arrangements for the move, and now moving day is almost upon us! we are scheduled to move on tuesday next.

meanwhile, we're still living our lives and enjoying the cuteness that belongs to parenthood. reed is our greeter. he says, "hi!" and "bye!" to everyone we pass--he even asks me to open his window so he can say hi to people as we're driving. he talks and sings all the time. my favorite is when he leaves my room, closing the door as he leaves, and says, "goo' night, mommy. i yeh you!" (in case that was too cryptic: "good night, mommy. i love you!") this is in the middle of the day, and sometimes while he is still eating his breakfast.

max has become something of a philosopher over the past few months. he really thinks about things, and then lets us in on his process.

this morning max said, "is it morning?"

"yes, it's morning."

"yeah, it's not time for dessert."

other funny max quotes that come to mind: "mom, when something is too hot, i lose my muscles."

"are these sunday socks?"

"no, sunday socks are dark."

"yeah, these are my wednesday socks! they give me running power!"

in case you didn't already know, max is a superhero. he zooms around with his complex lego creations (usually spaceships), singing his theme music (usually star wars), complete with sound effects. he even dreams it. i hear him in the middle of the night making light saber noises or some other kind of dramatic sound. here is a kid who has no trouble entertaining himself. :) he is also very aware of his brothers. he always wants to save part of his snacks for dean when he comes home from school, which i find very sweet.

dean is coming to grips with switching schools and houses, but had a total breakdown when we initially told him we were moving. he is reading like a pro now, even in the scriptures. his current obsession is a computer game that is amazingly motivating. he gets to play in the morning before school if he can get all ready beforehand. and for the past few weeks, he has been ready to go to school, shoes on, teeth brushed, bag packed, by 7:20 (go time is 8:00). he also knows how to start a load of laundry. he's turning into quite the big man.

next week dean will start formal piano lessons with a lady in our ward. he showed interest in playing and Grandma Corinne taught him some while troy and i were in CO, and since then i've tried to give him a lesson or two, but he rolls his eyes and sighs a lot, and nothing i say seems to change anything, so i figure we'll give it a shot with a third party and see how he does.

baby #4 is treating me well, but i'm really grateful that we are hiring movers this time to pack us. my back gives out at the slightest provocation. the boys have gotten really good at leaving me alone when i tell them i need to lie down. i just have to deal with differing levels of destruction when i emerge. troy is happy at work. his boss is thrilled that we're staying in the area. we will see where our final destination takes us. :)

best near-disaster so far today

2010-12-20T10:09:00.000-08:00

so i'm being lazy, still in my PJs, in my bed, at 10 am. my kids are kind of roaming the house looking for things to do. suddenly reed and max walk into my room, reed holding a bowl of an unidentified dark liquid, filled almost to the brim.

"what is that?!" i say, trying and failing to keep my voice in check.

"syrup," says max, with a shrug.

"syrup?"

"yeah," he sounds almost bored, as if it should be obvious why his 2-year-old brother should be wandering the house with a bowl full of syrup.

i sprint to the kitchen, expecting every surface covered in maple syrup.

but i am delighted to find that the mess is confined to one small section of counter top, and that most of the spill accompanying the pour from the syrup jar to the bowl is sopped up by a paper towel. all i have to do is un-sticky the handle of the stool pushed up against the counter, and finish wiping up what's left of the puddle.

sometimes my kids surprise me.

the near future

2010-12-08T23:45:00.000-08:00

all right, so it's the near future, and still no pictures in promised posts have materialized. i apologize. allow me to dazzle you with text instead.

recent events:

Tuesday before Thanksgiving we went to Disneyland as a family. Troy even took a day off work. :) Crowds were a bit lighter than expected, and a good time was had by all.

http://picasaweb.google.com/troywalk/ThanksgivingDisneyland?feat=content_notification#

Thanksgiving we spent with Aunt Mary Alice and company, which was very fun. We haven't seen much of her crew for a long time, so it was fun to catch up and just be comfortable extended family. Plus, any event with pie at the end is a good event.

Once December was upon us, we had to get a tree. Yes, a real one. And yes, it is impossible to go cut your own if you live in LA. But we also didn't need snow boots or four-wheel drive. We satisfied ourselves with going to Target. Except they didn't have trees. So we headed to Home Depot instead. And so did everyone else. But we got a tree, and Troy manfully hauled it through the makeshift forest while we waited in line to pay for said tree. And we're hoping that in the process we didn't discourage anyone around us in line from having children in the future. Maybe everyone just enjoyed the jollity. We got the tree home and discovered that the trunk was a mite too large for our stand. Troy retrieved his faithful ancestral blade (a buck knife with "T. Walker" engraved on its sheath, inherited from his grandfather, Troy Walker) and whittled down the trunk until it did fit in our stand. Our living room is still not satisfactorily arranged to accommodate the "living" and the tree, but we're making do.

Reed managed to turn two without a single shot taken of him, big moment or small. I have failed him as a mother, and all of you who wanted pictures of him. He hasn't changed much since those pre-Thanksgiving pics taken at Disneyland. Although it is a shame that we didn't take a picture of the cake either. It was straight out of a magazine, I tell you. One of these days I'm going to take a class and get really good at it. For now my technique is purely gleaned from TV.

Reed opened several presents on his big day, the contents of which have mostly been commandeered by his older brothers. I'm hoping by Christmas they'll let him play with his own stuff. The winner among the presents, as measured by playtime since, is definitely the motorized trains. Thank you, Grandma Corinne! When they decide that sharing is a good idea, it's pretty great. :) Tonight, I asked each boy what part of the day was their favorite, and Max answered, "when i got to play trains with Dean and Reed."

We even had a little party here, and then a reprise on Monday to further spread the cake joy, since otherwise I would have finished it myself and felt guilty for a few minutes. :)

I really enjoy Christmas and everything that goes along with the season. My favorite, though, is being able to participate in as much music-making as possible. (okay, it's neck and neck with all the yummy treats people bust out right about now) We've already had more than one Family Night that involved choosing favorite Christmas songs. This year I am involved in more music than in years past, probably because we're not traveling! Whatever the reason, I'm extremely happy to be able to play my flute, play piano, and sing, in choirs and solo, music that I love so deeply. Troy encourages me in all of this, even though it means I'm gone for chunks of Sunday afternoons and evenings and he is putting children to bed alone. It makes for a strange schedule, and I'm glad it won't last, but it's been really fun.

That's all for now, folks. Tune in next month I guess. :)

we're still alive

2010-11-02T16:24:00.001-07:00

i just looked and my last post was kind of a long time ago...

since march, several things have happened, the most life-changing of which is that we moved to a little house (post with pictures to follow, i promise) in our neighborhood so that Dean wouldn't have to change schools and we wouldn't have to disrupt our lives too much.

also life-changing for me: Andrea moved to Idaho in July, the day before Dean's 6th birthday. i do mean life-changing. there are so many ways i miss her that i can't begin to enumerate them. i'm functioning well, but it's an effort. having spent so much time with her in the past and watched how she is with people has given me inspiration for how to be now that she's gone. it's like i'm trying to fill in for her. i don't know if that even makes sense, but it's the best way i can think of to put it into words.

much of Troy's family came to see us in July, and the two of us got a vacation to San Francisco while Grandma stayed with the kids. and on top of keeping them occupied for seven days while we were gone, she got Max potty trained--or at least started on the path. we're still cleaning up puddles and clods now and again, but he's doing really well! extra points for Grandma! thank you again for volunteering to stay with my three hoodlums and let us have some time to reconnect. we had a great time!

the rest of the summer was pretty lazy and unstructured, which was fun, and then it was really time for school to start again. :) and now here we are, after Halloween!

so this is really a bit of a preview post. i have pictures and more details but didn't want to worry about putting them in order or pretending that all these things had just happened. they didn't. it was a while ago, and i'm just now getting back to the blog.

anyway there you have it, loyal readers. i'm committing to several posts in the near future.

the glamorous life

2010-03-26T13:20:00.000-07:00

ok folks. today i went to the park to meet up with a couple of friends. i hadn't been to this park in a while, and i don't really like it that much because it's always kind of crowded, and there's a beautiful duck pond where you can get really close to the water, which is heart-attack city for moms of young children, which is exactly who goes there all the time. but i was prepared for these considerations since i am quite familiar with the park.

i got there first, and noticed there was no parking on the block where the park is because there were a bunch of trucks parked there. the better part of the playground had been taped off, there were tables set up a ways off, all with the same bright blue table cloths, and there were a couple of catering trucks. i pulled up next to one where there were a couple of people hanging out and asked what was going on. they were shooting, like, all day, and you can maybe play on the fringes of the park that isn't roped off, but we have a permit. thanks!

several kids had breached the caution tape, and i figured, they probably won't start actually shooting for a while, so we'll get out when they kick us out. my friends arrived about 10 minutes before that happened, and then we were cast out into the unsafe-for-kids part(s) of the park. and there's only so much time you can spend running after kids who insist on running away towards the murky green duck-poop-algae water before your nerves are frayed. max kept looking for bridges across the water, which were at the other end of the park to where we were trying to play together, so i finally just bowed out as gracefully as i could. i let max look at the water and run across the bridges a little before heading back.

but it wasn't enough for the trucks to take up all the parking--they took up most of the sidewalk too, so we got to walk all slanty-like on the grass back up to our car. but, if you happen to see an apple commercial of kids playing in a sunny santa monica park, we were some of the people they had to kick out of the park so they wouldn't have to pay us. :) i love hollywood.

but the weather sure is nice!

The first T-Rex scene of Jurassic Park as told by a 3 year old:

2010-02-06T21:12:00.000-08:00

The big dinosaur is on the street!
And the man needed to go to the potty.
and the man said aaah and shut the door!
and the dinosaur BROKE the potty.
and he EAT him!

A Day at the Zoo

2010-01-06T16:46:00.001-08:00

Hi folks. I know it's been quite a while since I posted anything. But lest ye think we've totally dropped off the face of the earth, here is a little slide show provided by my friend, Star. She came with me so I wouldn't lose any children or my mind, and graciously took pictures of us.

Sidenote: I've never embedded a slideshow, but I thought it would save you the trouble of scrolling down for 4 days. I wrote captions for these pictures and I hope they show up. Here goes. :)

If you click on the pictures you can jump into my picasa web album and see them bigger, and without the captions taking up half the picture.

first day of school

2009-09-09T11:39:00.000-07:00

We walked to school for the first time this morning. Dean wanted to ride his bike, so here he is. I think he was watching a garbage truck, but it's kind of wistful too. Maybe I'm just a sentimental mom. Either way, there's my little boy with his big backpack, on his way to school.

We found Dean's name in the Kindergarten/First grade split class. Here he is, telling the kid across from him that he's funny. I don't think he had said or done anything, but Dean was laughing anyway. A few of the kids could find their own names and went to their desks. Dean was one of these. :) I still can't believe he's in school! I guess it'll sink in pretty soon.

After orientation, Dean and his classmates went back to the classroom. The teachers said the parents could hang out for maybe 20 minutes, and then go on our merry way. I tried to linger, but Dean said, "Mom, could you leave the classroom? It's just for kids." So I guess there are no attachment issues! Go Dean!

we love SMFD!

2009-08-15T13:55:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was eventful. I like to think that everything added up to this one cool experience for the boys. I needed to go replace the UV filter for my camera, and I was waiting for Reed to wake up from his morning nap. Max woke him up a bit prematurely, which annoyed me because I was about to fall asleep myself while I was waiting. But I got everybody ready to go and we were off to the camera store. This camera store is special because it used to be a model trains store, with a very cool display in the back. When the camera store moved in, they kept the model trains there and the train store is now across the street. At any rate, the boys were totally enthralled and wishing I would take longer with my business in the front of the store. Needless to say, they were not happy (and very vocal) about leaving.

It was still early, so I suggested we go to the park next to the Santa Monica airport. I wasn't sure how long we would stay or anything, but it occurred to me that we would get hungry, so we stopped at a sandwich shop right across the street from the park. While we were waiting for our sandwiches, a tall man in a blue uniform approached me and said, "Excuse me, ma'am? Would your boys like a sticker?" He had little SMFD shield stickers in his hand. "Of course!" I said. As soon as Dean saw them, he recognized their very glamourous profession and asked if they had a fire truck. "Yeah, it's parked right outside by the fire hydrant." And then he and his mates took Dean and Max outside to see the fire engine! I stood in the doorway of the shop and watched them go back and forth between the firetruck and me. At one point they disappeared for a minute, and then came back wearing fireman hats.Here they are with the firemen once we all had our food and were ready to leave. I just happened to have my camera with me so I could record this very cool happening. :) The firemen were so patient and just wonderful with the boys. I loved it that I wasn't trying to keep them quiet while we waited for our sandwiches to be ready. They showed them the truck, I saw lights flashing at some point, and they were just really nice. Way to go, Santa Monica Fire Department! Thanks for making our day!

Aren't they so cute? Dean was showing me his sticker (he put his on his shoulder so he would look like the firemen, with their badges on their shoulders).

I didn't want Reed to feel left out, so I took a picture of him too. He didn't have a sticker or a fireman hat. Next time, Reed!

Later on, Dean made a truck that he wanted to take a picture of. He posed with it, wearing his fireman hat, of course. What a fun day!

dean's uncanny musical memory manifests again

2009-08-04T14:55:00.001-07:00

while we were in boston visiting troy's folks, we watched a lot of youtube clips, one of which was this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0v3d6SFcDys

it's two songs: one by taylor swift and one by coldplay. when we got in the car this morning (a month later, not having heard either one in all that time), the coldplay song was on the radio. dean gasped and said, "mom! did we have this song in massachusetts?!" why, yes, we did.

there followed a most eventful trip to the grocery store, in which max ran away (luckily into the grocery store), dean caused a dirty look to be shot at mommy, and one lady asked, with complete disbelief, "are all of them yours?" yes! i have three children, not ten! and then i was thinking some very uncharitable thoughts, which did not bode well for getting everyone home, groceries away, lunch on the table, without some strife and much screaming. but all is well now. naptime is more of a gift some days than others. today, it was a gift. i just hope my children forgive me someday for learning how to be a parent on them.

Male Bonding

2009-08-02T23:14:00.000-07:00

In June, the oldest three males went camping on the central California coast. Here are some pictures of our fun day

The construction crew rests after helping raise the temporary shelter

Yay! Camping!!!

The intrepid explorers

FHE hilarity

2009-07-16T12:38:00.000-07:00

so monday night, we had family home evening about the pioneers, since our ward picnic is this saturday and it's pioneer day this month. troy gave the lesson, and used some pictures from the gospel art picture kit, including one of a wagon train crossing the frozen mississippi. in the wagon train there are some wagons with horses pulling them, and some with oxen pulling them. troy mentioned in passing that those who had more money would have used horses, and those with less money would have had cows (oxen) to pull their wagon. he continued with other pictures, and then was stacking the pictures up and then asked dean about the frozen river or something. dean was still focused on the horses and oxen. he said, "were the cows on sale?"

then he was confused because mommy was laughing so hard for so long. :) kids are funny.

addendum

2009-05-13T10:36:00.000-07:00

another example of dean's amazing mind yesterday:
i was listening to michael buble in the kitchen, doing dishes, and dean wanders in and says, "mom, this isn't the nemo song!"
for those of you not quite as familiar with finding nemo as we are around here, he was referring to the song "beyond the sea," which is played at the end of finding nemo, and is in the same style as the michael buble songs that i was listening to. i was impressed. :) but i'm his mom.
anyway i've decided to write these things down somewhere so i don't forget them. that way we can say, i always knew you were going to be a musician! or an engineer! or whatever. so i can be right, no matter what he turns out to be. :)

my child is a genius

2009-05-12T22:31:00.000-07:00

today i was impressed with dean's ingenuity.
first, he was using his Rocky crane car (the one that doesn't have its own engine--it needs Gordon to pull it around) to grab cars that had fallen off the tracks. one of the cars we have has a little log that tends to fall off often. so dean wanted to use Rocky to pick up the log, and when he couldn't use the magnet on the end of Rocky's crane arm to pick up the log, he asked me what the log was made of. "is it made of metal?" "no, dean, it's made of wood." "oh. here's a paper clip. paper clips are metal, right mom?" "yes, dean." and then he proceeded to attach a paper clip to it so he could play the way he wanted to.
later, i couldn't see what he was doing because i was playing with the baby. but he was apparently still thinking about magnets and metal:
"mom, are metals made of magnets?"
"what?"
"oh. i mean, are magnets made of metal?"
"yes"
"are batteries metal?"
"parts of them--the ends are metal, so they can conduct electricity"
"oh."
then i had to look and see what he was doing.
he had taken a bunch of AAA batteries from a drawer in our bedroom, and was loading them into the micromachines container, again using Rocky.

in other news, max correctly identified the colors of several objects this evening. max also did a hilarious dance with a mini maraca to entertain his baby brother. reed was laughing hysterically and it was pretty darn cute to watch.

it's just hair

2009-04-07T14:49:00.001-07:00

so my hair was getting out of control. i didn't like the way the layers were lying. i was convinced it looked like i had extensions in, even though it was all my hair. does everyone else have such distinct hair textures on one head of hair? i don't know. but that was my main complaint.

so i decided i wanted to have short hair again for a while. last time i cut it short dean was a baby. and he's almost five. so when i told my friend/hair stylist that i wanted to cut it all off, she measured it and said i had enough to make a wig and why don't i donate it? and i've never done that before, so i decided to go for it! of course i didn't bring my camera, but she had hers, so she chronicled my transformation and made this lovely collage for me to post on my blog of her handiwork. she did a great job (on the collage AND the haircut--way to go, angela!)

bear in mind, however, that i have been growing my hair out for the past four years or so, and now suddenly it doesn't hang past my chin. i think my biggest problem is how i'm realizing that i expect different personalities based on the length of hair. it sounds kind of silly, i know. but think about it. when a woman is described as having long flowing hair, i get a kind of romantic vision of what kind of person she is. when a woman is described as having hair up to her chin, i think of a chic and sleek kind of girl, or just cute. these are very different images in my mind. so, how does one go from romantic to chic in a matter of minutes? i don't know. i recognize my own reflection now, at least, and i'm thinking of things to do with it besides leave it down all the time.

when we left angela's house, dean told me i had "boy hair" and that he didn't like it. he hasn't said much about it since then, but i'm glad i don't hang my identity on my hair--anymore. i was surprised at how purely physical the change was. i didn't lie awake at night mourning the loss of my "one beauty," nor did i think i looked like a whole new person who would be suddenly captivating with my new haircut. i'm still me, just with less hair. :)

i had a thought

2009-03-04T22:51:00.000-08:00

today as i was attempting, ultimately unsuccessfully, to get a nap, i had a thought. dean had just finished watching piglet's big movie and the music was still running through my head. i thought how perfect carly simon's voice fits as piglet's singing voice, and i wondered if the idea to ask her to do the music for the movie came in a flash of inspiration to someone in charge of the music, and whether they acknowledged it as an answer to prayer at all. and then i thought, does it really matter?
and the answer i came up with surprised me. it doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things how well the music turned out for a movie that went straight to video. but maybe that was an inspiration to that person at a time of personal stress. maybe that person has great satisfaction about this project they worked on. and maybe the reason God answers little prayers about things that don't matter is that that's how we, the little people, gain the faith necessary to depend on Him in everything. if He answers a prayer about what CD i should put in to listen to right now, He would answer a prayer about whom i should marry. if He answers a prayer about which park i should go to with the kids today, He would answer a prayer about where we should live.
i think the fact that He answers even the insignificant prayers we utter without much formality is also a way for us to gather evidence of how much He loves us. He loves us enough to help us figure out how much soup to make for dinner so that we have enough for an unexpected visitor, or to inspire people to call us when we're feeling down, or to inspire us to extend an invitation to someone who might need our company.
so that was my deep thought this afternoon as i tried to work past the irritation of not being allowed to get a nap to make up for the lack of sleep the night before. but how many opportunities did i have to serve my little children today? i'll just try and think of it that way and stop holding my two-year-old accountable for my cranky mood. am i a grown-up yet?

a valentine's day feast

2009-02-19T00:22:00.000-08:00

This is the valentine my husband made for me. dean came into our room and rummaged around in the closet until he found soldering wire. so they were playing with it and i was still pretending to sleep. all of a sudden troy hands me this little heart he fashioned out of wire. and i melted. :)

this is my genius four-year-old eating tofu with chopsticks.

here's max trying to stab his sushi with a chopstick, but getting his soup bowl instead. a moment before, he successfully stabbed a sushi and ate it, but i think the bite was too big and he chickened out on bite-the-size-of-my-head number two.

and here is the man himself, looking dangerous and manly with his chef knife. he's cutting a sushi roll. what a man! (that's dean trying to relieve him of the dangerous knife)

here are the dishes my lovely husband made for dinner on valentine's day:

sushi with fish (first try--looks pretty good!)

cha siu baau! hou hou sihk!

miso soup from scratch. yes, that dark green stuff is seaweed.

pork potstickers.

that is true love, ladies and gentlemen.

name them one by one...

2009-02-17T09:07:00.000-08:00

as i woke up this morning to the sound of my struggling baby and looked at the clock, i really resented the fact that i was the only one in the house who had to be awake at 4:49 am. it was very warm in my bed, and quite chilly outside it. so as i got up and donned my robe, picked up my hungry child and settled into feeding posture, i decided i needed to do a gratitude exercise. so before i need to get out of bed for real and face my day, i wanted to post about what i came up with at 5 am.

1. my baby goes to bed at a reasonable hour most nights (almost always before midnight, usually before 11), and doesn't wake up until close to 5, sometimes more like 6. that's miraculous for a two-month-old. plenty of people get up at that time and stay up--start the day--but i am allowed to go back to bed for a couple of hours. and maybe other new moms should not be reading this so that they will still be friends with me.

2. i am not the driver of the large vehicles i heard go down my street at 5 am. what time did they have to get up to be driving the garbage truck down my street that early?

3. i have a husband. that in itself is something to be grateful for, but my husband is also the most generous, selfless, wonderful man, and for some reason he decided that i was worthy of his attention forever. i'll never understand how i got so lucky. but besides that miracle, he is an amazing husband and father, always stepping in to help at the right moment. this morning he dealt with dean's poop while i lay in bed. what a man!

4. i had a happy childhood. despite the guilt my parents may feel about their behavior while they were figuring out how to be parents (which i mention only because i now know how they must have felt), i came out of it knowing i was loved, and a whole person, and able to forgive their mistakes--knowing they are human too. that all gives me hope that my kids will be able to forgive me when they have kids.

5. i am living the life i always dreamed of, and i'm learning more and more that it really is the life i want. it's taken me three kids to arrive at this place where i have what i want and want what i have--even if it means getting up at 5 am to feed a baby for a little while--but i'm here now, and my life is great.

i got warm again, after getting out of bed so early. my baby also has an amazing knack for settling down quickly once he's fed.

and that was way more fun than a list of complaints.

i am superwoman

2009-02-11T15:24:00.001-08:00

i just wanted to post while i'm having such a good day. i've had a non-superwoman day or two in recent days, but i'm feeling on top things today because...
drumroll, please...
i, maurine, went to costco with a baby strapped to my chest and two boys in my cart. i spent too much money, probably, but we all came out alive and in good spirits despite the fact that no food was consumed by any of us while in the store. tada!
all please note: my kitchen is not spotless, the living room needs vacuuming, and my room is still a disaster. but i'm still proud of what i accomplished today, and very proud of my boys for being so patient (or asleep, in reed's case) in the store. i got many amazed looks from other costco shoppers, and one man even said, "you're my new hero!" to me. so i'm basically superwoman. :)

in other news, dean has done all of his excreting in the proper receptacle so far today. also, max stayed in his bed all night last night. and reed, angel child, slept 8 hours in a row. and my bachelor brother just got engaged less than an hour ago! what more could i ask for? this is a good day and i wanted to document part of it, at least, so i can remember that i have good days too.

so there we have it. life is officially good.

another word or two about the cake

2009-02-01T15:28:00.000-08:00

max liked the cake. he was more interested in eating the sprinkles off the cake than the actual cake, i think, but he still managed to cover his face in frosting. but what else do you expect from a little boy turning two?

so i was really proud of this cake. i was pleased that the size of the bowls i used to bake the ears was right. i learned how to draw mickey and practiced ad infinitum as a kid. but it's been a few years, so i was surprised at how well the face turned out, especially since i haven't used a piping bag for at least ten years. i kind of want to decorate cakes more. that was really fun! maybe i'll actually make and decorate cookies for a holiday in the near future. and post more pictures!

ok now i've had my say about the details surrounding max's second birthday. you may go back to your lives, citizens.

2009-01-31T19:55:00.000-08:00

Max turned two. Here's a video of the event. We sang a lot. Maurine made an impressive cake. Pictures at at Picasa Web Albums: http://picasaweb.google.com/troywalk/MaxBirthdayNumberTwo

max the real boy

2009-01-26T22:03:00.001-08:00

here's one last look at those pretty curls. i have to say it was a bittersweet moment for me. as much as i loved seeing those curls, his hair was just too long. and you can't tell that well from the pictures, but the texture and color of his hair has changed since his last haircut.
so now i can see his big brown eyes without having to move his hair out of the way. still irresistably cute, and now less likely to be asked whether he's a girl. :) also, i'm no longer tempted to do his hair in pigtails or a clip to keep it out of his eyes. i just hope, when i do have a girl, that she has hair like max's! not to mention the eyelashes. goodness gracious.

more christmas fun

2009-01-25T22:46:00.001-08:00

i think someone told max "no" or something. i just love that shot--it's so telling. think maybe he's near two years old? anyone?

dean decided he needed to do maintenance on his bike, as you can see, and apparently he thought he was also in danger of falling or otherwise injuring himself while doing maintenance on his bike as well as riding it.
i had to grab the camera when i noticed that dean wouldn't take off his bike gear to eat lunch. can't be too careful, i always say.
the last two shots are the boys actually on their bikes. dean got a little farther than max on his first try. :) but he's the big brother, after all. i'm sure max will get it eventually. and maybe someday we'll find a helmet that fits that head!

i hope everyone had a wonderful christmas. i find myself very full of gratitude. i'm grateful for new beginnings and new discoveries and new pajama bottoms. :) i'm more grateful every day for my three little boys and my husband, who together make my life worth living. i'm grateful that we have a reason to celebrate christmas.

we all had a wonderful time with our family who came to visit. thank you to everyone who made this christmas so memorable. we love you all!

christmas at home

2009-01-25T14:41:00.000-08:00

we had a quiet christmas day, just our little family. we bought our tree from the parking lot of the grocery store a block or two away. the man who helped us was really nice. he was a good sport about dean's endless questions. isn't it a beauty? can you tell where max could reach the ornaments? :)
the bikes pretty much saved dean's christmas. i had been reading the polar express to the boys for about a week before christmas, and i think that's where his idea of a christmas wish came from. after every present that wasn't a semi-truck, dean would say, "oh no! it's the wrong present!" when the bikes came out, though, he seemed to forget about it. now he's just letting us know that he wants a semi-truck for his birthday. max hasn't totally shared dean's interest in the bike, probably because his balance on his own two feet is still somewhat lacking. but they sure were cute on their bikes on christmas day!

somewhere here you can see what santa brought. (i'm giving up trying to make the text match the pictures.)aren't those wall e dolls the coolest? the mini shoes and hat were for reed. the hat, actually, was handmade for reed by his talented aunt hailey. gotta love the christmas tree hat! as you can see from the picture, reed loves it too. :) thanks, aunt hailey!

thanks mom!

2009-01-24T23:51:00.000-08:00

just wanted to say thanks to my wonderful mother. i can't believe you squeezed another kid into the space between my kids. we've talked before about how maybe the only reason it worked out that way for you was so that others would be inspired. "well, she had FOUR by the time her oldest was four and a half! i should be GRATEFUL for this level of order!"

i still marvel that we all turned out so well and that you, dear mother, are still sane. thanks for coming to help us out. you had some nasty messes to clean up thanks to the lovely stomach bug that worked its way through our family and yours (and on to the walkers, who came later, after we thought the bug was done!), but you soldiered on. you took the night shift so that i could go right back to bed after feeding the baby. you did dishes so we could just sit once dean and max were in bed. thank you, once again, for coming to ease the transition from one baby to the next. you're awesome!

p.s. i thank you for buying twilight for me. i don't know how troy feels about that, exactly, considering how the next few weeks went for him while i was in forks. :)

reed benjamin makes his appearance

2009-01-24T22:56:00.000-08:00

yay! reed finally came! don't i look fabulous!
the play-by-play:
10:00 am - drop off dean and max at our friend's house while we are at the hospital
10:30 am - get to the hospital, get hooked up to monitors, which show that contractions are not regular or productive. how typical.
11:30 am - dr arrives, checks me. no, my water isn't broken, and no i'm not in labor. BUT--i am dilated to a 5! so she breaks my water, tells me to get an epidural sooner rather than later.
12:00 pm - epidural man arrives!
4:00 pm - still dilated to a 5. pitocin drip begins.
5:30 pm - PUSH! carefully--the cord is wrapped around his neck.
5:46 pm - reed is born. he's blue, until he gets rubbed down and sucked out. then he pinks up and cries out.

the stats:
name: reed benjamin walker
birthweight: 8 lb 13 oz
length: 19 1/2 inches
time of birth: 5:46 pm
date of birth: 5 december 2008

and here are his perfect little limbs.

big brothers dean and max greet the new little one.

mom and dad with reed. picture taken by my cousin kim. thanks for coming down, kim! i felt so loved to have a visitor in the hospital. :)

yes, they still insist on a wheelchair. and yes, troy insisted on taking pictures all the way from the room to the car. but i won't post all the pictures of me descending the ramp to the parking lot. we'll just keep those to ourselves.

you're welcome.

just one more week...

2008-11-30T22:00:00.000-08:00

until grandma gets here to await baby's arrival. :) i make no promises about when that date will actually be. i do know that i will be 40 weeks one week from today. so take that as you will.

in the past two weeks, we've had some adventures. it started last weekend when Dean puked over the side of his bed. that was awesome. two days later Max got sick (but not on the carpet this time, thankfully). the adults managed to escape this little virus, but it made for a few days of stir-crazy mommy and kiddos. it was also when the wildfires were close to us, causing much smoke in the air--so much so that there were advisories about whether schools would cancel because of the air quality. so we didn't leave the apartment for about three days. the saving grace was when my friend came over to help me. i was kind of joking when i said, "well, we can start in the kitchen, and then there are bathrooms and vacuuming to do," and she said, "ok!" and we went to work! she emptied the sink of dishes, scrubbed the stove, took out the trash, and then moved on to the dining area while i wiped down counters, scrubbed burners, and cleaned the floor. i think just being around someone who had some energy did wonders, but the fact that she got started on the seemingly herculean task of cleaning my house really helped me feel like i could do something. we each have two boys roughly the same ages, so they were playing happily most of the time we were cleaning. after she left i finished vacuuming the living area, which i have been meaning to do for a couple weeks but felt too daunted to start.
the three days before thanksgiving i was extremely blessed by friends who knew i was suffering. i was able to get a pedicure, go to the dr. sans children, and go christmas shopping sans children. and rather than feel guilty about having other people watch my kids this week, i have just felt rejuvenated. when was the last time i spent an hour in a bookstore?
and then troy was home for a long weekend! my lovely husband scrubbed our bathroom floor this weekend, on his hands and knees! i've been able to stay in bed in the morning and get naps in the afternoons because he's been home. it's been so nice to have so much help and really not feel like i have to do it all but can't because my body won't let me. delegate!

we got pretty lucky as far as thanksgiving was concerned: we got to do it twice! and make pies! thanksgiving day we went to aunt mary alice's house and spent the day with her children and grandchildren and a couple of in-laws of her children. lots of good food, and card games into the night. saturday we went to aunt heidi's house and spent the evening with her and aunt dori and their families. i was expecting leftovers and maybe fresh mashed potatoes or something, but no. this was a whole other turkey, stuffing, yams, mashed potatoes, the works. it was great! and all the cooking i ended up doing was a pumpkin pie. troy did the rest of the pie-baking: an apple pie and chocolate pudding pie for thanksgiving at aunt mary alice's, and then another apple pie to bring with my pumpkin pie to aunt heidi's. he's really good at peeling apples! :)

another blessing i feel much more because i'm so pregnant right now: the weather has cooled off considerably this weekend. it actually rained early this week, and today i don't think it got warmer than 70 degrees. AND it's foggy. love it! (i know, for all of you living in harsh climates, it's hard to hear me complain about the weather in southern california, but the metaphor of "cooking" a "bun in the oven" has a sure foundation in the collective experience of expectant mothers.)

so we end the week on an up. thank you to all who are praying for us, and especially for the little babe inside me. he's strong, trust me! now we're just praying for patience and a speedy delivery. i've never done well in the homestretch of a pregnancy, but i'm trying! my bag is packed and in the car, even! i'm ready to go. :) so thank you for all your help and prayers.

more recent news

2008-11-16T23:54:00.000-08:00

of course, foremost in my mind is the countdown to baby's arrival. today marks 37 weeks. huzzah! i'm down to weekly dr. visits, and i'm feeling guilty that my bag isn't packed yet. i guess i subconsciously don't believe it "could happen any time now." then again, i was induced twice. anyway, highlights from the past week or so:
1. the election is over!
2. prop 8 passed! (although it doesn't feel over on that one)
3. Wicked was amazing. really thought-provoking story, witty dialogue, great music. kudos to troy for getting tickets and initiating a date!
4. dean got his first "big poop" prize--rocky the crane car. all he could talk about once it was out of the package was taking it to kansas grandma's house so rocky could help gordon get back on the tracks. so, kansas grandma, we're coming for you! (for those of you unfamiliar with our potty training terminology, a "big poop" is one that is completely on the toilet--not some here, some there, let's pick some up from anywhere)
5. the weather cooled off for a couple days. that was awesome. i wore long sleeves one day, even.
6. i got to play my flute with the stake choir in stake conference today. i think the practices were more fun, but it's such a pretty piece, and several people commented on my playing afterwards. yay mommy!

things i learned (maybe for the first time, maybe again)
1. protests that block the streets make it hard to get from our house to the theater in under two hours. (our date just happened to be the same night as the protest in front of the temple, causing the temple and sections of santa monica blvd to shut down, which made traffic, well, wicked.)
2. expecting to complete three errands in the same outing, with two kids in tow, is just too ambitious for one as pregnant as i.
3. expecting to be able to recover from such a morning quickly is also too ambitious for one as pregnant as i.
4. the secret to a clean (enough) house is just doing something every single day.
5. it's really okay to call someone for help when i find myself drowning--it's what friends are for. i don't have to do everything myself. (thanks, ellen!)
6. the list of things that need to be done is often shorter on paper than it is when everything is swimming around in my head. and not everything is really an all-day project, even though it seems that way. deciding to do one thing per day and then actually doing it is really satisfying.
7. i can change the mood in our house by singing a song.
8. potty training really is a process. all processes have ups and downs. the bottom line is, as long as progress is being made, things are moving in the right direction.

parting thoughts:
perspective breeds patience. when you step back far enough, an hour, a day, a month gets shorter in the grand scheme of things. anything that is not eternal is temporary. we need to use the stages in our lives to learn eternal truths that we can take with us.
i need to remind myself of this often, especially when i'm changing diapers or picking up every toy we own again, but knowing that it won't be this way forever is what keeps me going sometimes. i know i will miss things about this time in my life in the future, so i'm trying to just enjoy the ride--and i do, often. my dad told me, "these are the good old days," so i try to think of things that way. these are the stories our kids will crack up about in 10 years and the rest of their lives. life is good.

halloween!

2008-11-16T23:35:00.000-08:00

i have a confession to make: these pictures are a reenactment of halloween night. it's not really halloween, but we wanted to document the cutest lion and monkey in history.

we carved our jack-o-lantern for FHE the monday following halloween. troy decided to get creative with the holes in the pumpkin, because i think there was a moldy spot on our pumpkin before we started! anyway, that explains the hand coming out of jack's head, for those of you wondering.

and we have to admit to some cruelty here. max didn't have any idea that we weren't REALLY going trick-or-treating again. poor little guy! but don't worry--he had a fun night on all hallows' eve, got plenty of candy and "awww, that's the cutest lion i've ever seen!"s. dean understood what was going on eventually, but they both needed a "trick-or-treat" to settle them down right before bedtime. (we are the awesomest parents EVER)

again, i apologize for any funky text-to-picture-nonmatching.

little trip

2008-11-16T23:04:00.000-08:00

so, the same week we had our carpets cleaned we also went to the bay area to make troy's boring business trip a mini-vacation. the boys and i dropped daddy off at the airport, and then got back on the highway and drove to mountain view. kind of crazy, but it was fun. the boys were really good in the car (many answered prayers) and i managed to stay sane on I-5 for five hours. all those cows...

anyway that was thursday night, and we got to see a former mission companion of troy's at his apartment--in mountain view!

here is troy with his former companion, darcy. oh, and that's max, rummaging through the toys. (get a load of that hair!)

darcy has two little boys--and they had trains. so, do you think dean ate dinner with us?

yeah. that's tidmouth sheds right there, folks. dinner comes waaay after that on dean's priority list.

friday the boys and i played at a park and then went to see a friend from LA who recently moved to santa rosa. they were in the midst of getting into a house that weekend so we drove all the way up to her house and then all the way back to mountain view. it was an adventure--and of course i forgot to bring out the camera. :( hope you're in your house by now, lezlie!

saturday we went to san francisco and took the alcatraz cruise, which of course included a boat ride. :) it was a lovely day. it's really beautiful there (in the city--probably not from inside the prison, eh, dean?)

that was our little family mini-vacation in the bay. i must admit it was pretty exhausting for my oh-so-pregnant body. the drive home was peaceful as well--so much nicer with another adult to talk to!

i apologize for leaving the blog alone for so long. i was on a roll for a while! i must confess i get pretty disappointed when i check blogs of friends and family and there's nothing new week after week, so i'm trying not to disappoint. :) speaking of disappointment, sorry the text and pictures don't line up exactly perfectly. i'm learning.

hooray for clean carpet

2008-10-26T22:58:00.000-07:00

i promise our week was more exciting than getting our carpet steam-cleaned, but that's what i am most excited about right now. i figured out that our carpets haven't been this clean since we came home from our vacation last summer--that's over a year! we deciphered through the "english" on our bill (can you write with an accent?) that we are being charged extra because our carpet was "xtra" dirty in the "dinnen room." (i want to save the bill as a memento of our LA experience) not surprising when you consider a year's worth of max learning to use a fork happened over that carpet.

so i've been struggling a lot in the past couple of weeks. i am just too tired to be patient some days. i can't bend over or see my feet; i can't make the baby stop moving when i want to sleep, or really relax, or find a good position to sleep in, which makes sleeping difficult if not futile. this means that i have very little energy to spend on the boys or housework. and if i do use what energy i have to do something like sweep the kitchen floor or go grocery shopping, i have none left to try and understand the needs of my children. this makes for cranky mommy and cranky kids. i had a particularly harrowing grocery store episode this week, and it's probably a good thing i didn't do a post about it because i would have sounded a bit monstrous.
today at church i really felt that i got the answers i have been seeking with regard to my struggles. of course i want to be patient with my children, not constantly yelling at them. anyway i had several thoughts based on talks and lessons from the day:
1. focus on having the Spirit at home--help my children feel it. that's how they will learn what the Spirit feels like and build their testimonies. i can't give them a testimony or make them understand anything. it has to happen within them. my responsibility as their mother is to be worthy of the Spirit myself, create an atmosphere where the Spirit can dwell, and help my children recognize the feeling.
2. the first thing the Savior does when He is troubled is pray to His Father.
3. i should pray every time i need help keeping my cool--in the moment, not just a sweeping request in the morning, expecting it to be easy to then control my temper all day.
4. i need to be willing to work before i pray, and present the plan i have to the Lord in a prayer rather than just a wishlist.
5. there has to be a correspondence of wills as we submit our will to Heavenly Father.
6. prayer is a privilege--if we had time with our Father in person, what would we say? how would our prayers be different? what a powerful image!
also, i have had many offers of help from people in the ward lately (i think my belly is inviting more greetings of, "how are you doing?"). so i think that this is a message to me that i can't do everything on my own, and it's okay. i have people around me ready and willing to help, so ask for help! there's no shame in it. i have two energetic children and a very active baby inside me that taxes my body and emotions. so there you have it. i need to pray more so i have the Spirit more, and ask for and accept more help without any guilt. accepting help from people who offer does not make me a failure.

small triumphs

2008-10-19T21:48:00.000-07:00

1. i did not pick up any poop off the floor this week.
2. i did not kill either of my children.
3. i have the best husband in the world--he bought tickets to a broadway show AND did everything this weekend so i could have a break.
4. i am no longer out of sweet things to eat after the kids are in bed.
5. i will probably make it through this coming week, too.

potty training continues

2008-10-12T22:24:00.000-07:00

potty training lessons of the week:
1. dean does well when forced; i.e., when his choices are peeing on the floor or in the toilet.
2. dean does not do well when his bowels are either diseased or unbalanced. i won't go into how i know that exactly. let's just say thursday evening was not my favorite time this week.

in other news, troy (months after i made my list) went through the baby names book and made his list. here are the only coinciding names we came up with independently: brigham, hal/henry, reed, sid/sidney, ty/tyrus. thoughts, anyone?
pregnancy continues to go well, although i think it's a little more achy this time. i feel like i should only have maybe 4 weeks to go based on my energy level and aching back, but i really have about 9. so it is getting close, and i'm trying to be patient and not wish away the time i have with "only" two kids because i don't want to be pregnant anymore. i do well most days, and the boys are really cute about my belly. dean likes to play games with binko (that's his name for the baby) and ask me if binko is having a party for him, or laughing because dean is being silly. max likes to be soft ("kaah") on my belly, stroking very gently. i think he's picked up "binko" as well--he says "eeko" sometimes when dean is asking me what the baby is doing.

i have had many moments this week of pure joy and gratitude for my family. i have been in awe of how beautiful my sons are, how precious their lives are, and their absolute joy in finding an ant on the sidewalk and letting it crawl on their arms. i am living the life i always wanted, and i think i'm learning to appreciate it while it's happening. my loving husband makes things fun again when i can't give any more, which happens pretty often these days; my two boys are learning every day, working on becoming who they will be; my body responds well to the rigors of pregnancy and lifting my solid 20-month-old so often; i have good people all around me who have been or are where i am in life and are full of encouragement and help for me; i know my Heavenly Father knows me, loves me, and approves of my efforts to keep a good home and raise our children in light and truth.

this calls for a celebration!

2008-10-05T17:26:00.001-07:00

i just wanted everyone to know that Dean pooped in the toilet today. HUZZAH!

we didn't take pictures, so there's nothing graphical to post (you're welcome), but this is a momentous occasion. he ran up to us in the kitchen asking for a wipe, which to me meant, "help! i've pooped on the floor." so while troy asked him if he had any more that needed to come out and shepherded him to the toilet, i got the poops up off the floor. then max wanted to go potty. he kept trying to take his diaper off, grunting all the way. maybe we'll have two potty-trained boys soon! how awesome would that be? but i'm not holding my breath.

sure enough, dean had some more in there and it went into the toilet! first time since a rather traumatic experience two summers ago in BC. (for more details on the BC event, you can ask me individually.)

time flies

2008-10-05T16:48:00.000-07:00

It's hard to believe that Dean was once just two years old, getting his first haircut. Now he has a little brother almost as old as he was the last time we posted on our blog! This is little Max getting his first haircut. (We let a professional do this one.) He did such a good job sitting still in the chair!

Transition to Boyhood

2006-06-11T22:20:00.000-07:00

Halfway cut. Maybe a rattail would be cool.
All done.

Anniversary Trip and Big Big Shoes

2006-06-11T22:09:00.000-07:00

Maurine found a swell shark!
Ahoy! 3 years of marriage ahead!
Meanwhile, Dean is at home wearing Dad's shoes and taking care of the homestead.
That's a lot of boats
Dean's ready to go play in the sand.

2006-04-24T00:51:00.000-07:00

Come on Dad! You're holding me back!
Bao!

Mmmmmmghf

2006-04-24T00:31:00.000-07:00

Dean's planning the most efficient route.
Hey look! A pirate bird!
Up close and personal with the reptiles.
Mingo!
Look mah, a beepa!

Three weeks at the beach

2005-06-19T23:02:00.000-07:00

This was Dean's first trip to the beach back in August 2004

Dean at Waimea

2005-06-08T20:08:00.000-07:00

When we were in Hawaii, we went to the beach. Dean liked the sand.

The sand was really grainy but smooth mashed up shells and when he stuck his face in it, it really stuck. He didn't seem to mind though.